Saturday, August 22, 2009
Football has started. Chris went to scout this week but Guyer won their first scrimmage. The season starts next Friday and it's looking like Guyer is going to be pretty great!
Thursday, August 13, 2009
During dinner I looked at Chris and just started crying (I'm such a sap!). My life is SO much more blessed than anything I deserve. This last year has been hard on me in a lot of ways but has also been absolutely amazing. I'm so thankful for the Lord's grace and mercy and Him pouring it out on me even though I don't deserve it-not even a little bit!
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Why do I do that? Why do I think it's okay to have my own agenda and my own plan? I'm stopping TODAY. My plan was to get married, love on each other for a year and then have a baby to share that love with. Did that happen? NO! My plan was to live in St. Louis forever and ever amen by my family. Did that happen? NO! So from here on out-I have no plans. Sure, I have dreams and ambitions but they will happen in God's amazingly perfect timing under His amazingly perfect plan. He knows what's best for me and even when it's not how I want it, it's the way it should be. I'm thankful for that but sometimes it's really hard to rest in it. It's hard to give up control. I kinda imagine my plans as sand. I grab the sand (my plans) with my clenched fist and hold on for dear life. The Lord tells me to let go and I loosen my grip but still keep a fist. Some of the sand falls out but I've still got a whole lot left in my hand. I really think I'm letting go but I really haven't-I just loosened my death grip on my life. He wants all MY plans. And think about it-how much more beautiful is a beach full of sand than just my tiny fist full? A WHOLE LOT IS RIGHT!
I wish I could tell you exactly what's going on in my life right now but to be completely honest, I'm not sure what it is yet. I'll fill you in when I find out. In the mean time, I'm praying that I would give God control and trust Him fully because His will is SO much better than anything I could plan on my own.
I'm glad I serve a God who cares about EVERY intricate detail of my life. That's pretty amazing.
How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me! Psalms 139:17-18 (NLT)
Thursday, August 6, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
If you're married, you probably know that verse. As you know if you've been reading through my Proverbs reflections (or anything having to do with God's Word) you know I love the Message. Something about it speaks so real to me and I love how it tells us how to love-
Your spring water is for you and you only, not to be passed around among strangers.Bless your fresh-flowing fountain! Enjoy the wife you married as a young man!Lovely as an angel, beautiful as a rose—don't ever quit taking delight in her body. Never take her love for granted! Proverbs 5:18-19
As a wife, I need to be reminded to not take Chris' love for granted. In the beginning and during dating years, I noticed EVERYTHING that he did for me. After 3 1/2 years of marriage, I don't look for them as often anymore. But that's not how God created marriage to be. He wants me to always delight in Chris and to be thankful for him and his love for me. He designed marriage PERFECTLY and if I follow His instructions-it will be a perfect love. Of course we all fall short but that's something I definitely want to strive for. Marriage is a serious covenant designed by God and I want our marriage to be pleasing to Him.
***BY THE WAY-if you don't have a Message Bible (I don't!), go to BibleGateway, type in what you want to look up and change it to The Message. There are times when I don't really know what to think about a verse and I'll change it to The Message or New Living Translation and it puts it into something that speaks to my heart. I LOVE NIV and all the verses I have memorized are NIV but I do like to see how other translations say it as well. Just thought you may like to know!***
LOVE! Black leggings, a scarf possibly. The only bad part is I loved it so much I paid full price for it...oops! Dave Ramsey would not be happy-although it was in my budget so I guess he wouldn't be too mad =)
Thinking I need to be productive and go up to school and work. Proverbs 5 tonight!
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
When I read that verse I think about what I'm putting into my heart/mind. You know the saying "what goes in must come out"? That's true of my heart too. If I'm putting in trash and things of the world, it's going to come out in my words and actions. If I'm putting in things that are good for my heart and glorify God, that's going to come out. It's not hard for me to decide which one I want. The chapter goes on to say (from the Message this time)-
Don't talk out of both sides of your mouth; avoid careless banter, white lies, and gossip. Proverbs 4:24
I think this hits home for me too. It's hard as a woman not to fall into the trap of gossip. Go to a hair or nail salon...that's what women do! They like to talk about how others look, act, dress, etc. Sometimes I think my intentions are pure but I really wouldn't want someone else talking about me in the manner that I talked about them. So here's my prayer today-that I would guard my heart from the "junk" of this world and that I would be careful of what comes out of my mouth. These go hand in hand. If my heart is guarded and what goes in is good, my words will stay pure. Man, God sure puts some smart things in His Word, huh???
Monday, August 3, 2009
How could we live but not see
You reign, You reign
Today is August 3rd so I read the Proverbs 3. You know when God keeps bringing something up over and over again and you're not sure why? He's doing that to me right now. He keeps bringing up fear. I really don't think I have a lot of fear in my life but apparently He's trying to reveal it to me. Here's some examples-
**Friday we went to the Phillips, Craig, and Dean concert and they talked about their new CD "Fearless." They talked about how as Christians we're not to FEAR the economy, the decisions of the president, or even everyday trials because God is in control. He has a plan and He is good. That really got my heart stirring...
**Some elders from the church gave their testimonies on Sunday. All of them were about being fearful-God took away something from each of them that they cared about (their businesses, family member, etc.) and they were scared. They had to get rid of that fear and learn to trust.
**Now I'm reading Proverbs and what's really jumping out at me is this-
24 You can go to bed without fear; you will lie down and sleep soundly. 25 You need not be afraid of sudden disaster or the destruction that comes upon the wicked, 26 for the Lord is your security. He will keep your foot from being caught in a trap. Proverbs 3:24-26
I'm not sure EXACTLY what the Lord is showing me but I think it may be that I am fearful of never having a baby. I claim to trust God but my faith is weak. I get scared that it may not happen for me. I'm listening to what He's saying and I see that He's trying to remove the fear from my life. I know He's trying to mold me during this waiting period, which I LOVE, and this is one of the things he trying to squeeze out. Pray that I would get rid of the fear and replace it with FAITH!
*****On a side note-started the Clomid again and HOLY HOT FLASH! I've gone from freezing to BURNING STINKING HOT within seconds all day long. Is this what menopause is going to be like????*****